Jesus Wept: A Devotional on Finding Comfort in Grief

February has been a lot. We’ve had a family member sick for two straight weeks. Don’t even get me started on politics. My uncle passed away unexpectedly in a tragic accident. He was just 60 years old. Every single day I think about him. Every day I’m surprised to remember the world no longer has him in it. 

I’m sad. Sometimes I am sad for my aunt–losing the love of her life. Other days I weep for my cousins who no longer have a dad. Other days I cry for my own dad who lost his best buddy, his built-in friend, the one who could always make him throw back his head and laugh. Other days I am simply sad for myself, for losing a man who was good and fun and irreverent and deeply caring.  

I’m sad about the state of the world. Frustrated, overwhelmed, and grieved by the unilateral decisions of an administration that seems bent against justice and common sense. I’m worn thin by constantly caring for sick people. The mental load of “should I take them to the doctor?”, making plans and cancelling plans, and doling out medications has me exhausted. I’m touched out, but also still showing up for endless cuddles and head strokes. 

I’ve read my Bible some, but the words of Genesis and Exodus in my Bible reading plan that I began bright eyed and bushy-tailed at the first of the year are falling flat. So I turn instead to the Psalms, a place where tears are always welcome. Where grief is allowed, and anger too. 

I tread the gospels again. Wanting to walk hand in hand with Jesus. The man who knew the loss of a father, someone who was intimately acquainted with grief. I turn the shortest verse in the Bible around in my head like a talisman. Jesus wept. Jesus wept. Jesus wept. 

In John 11:35 Jesus let his tears flow. He howled against death and injustice, sad to the core. Like me–Jesus wept. Even though he knew his friend Lazarus was in the presence of God. Even though he knew he would raise him back to life on earth in mere moments. Even though he knew he would beat death forever. Jesus wept. Jesus wept. Jesus wept. 

We are built for eternal life. And so death makes us weep. Sickness, injustice, and unrest weigh us down. It feels unfair because it is.

We weren’t meant for mourning. And yet, here we are. Broken, sick, and sad. Struggling through life in a world that rejects God, with a soul that rejects Him sometimes too. Knowing that it got to Jesus too–that he felt it all–the hopelessness, the loss, the overwhelming flood of emotions–it brings me peace. 

I know Jesus will sort out everything. I know my heart is safe with Him. I know His arms are a secure place to rest. That I can lean on Him. Weep with him. I feel no rush to move on from grief, to try to wrap this crappy February up with a nice bow. Instead you will find me sad… leaning on the arms of my Jesus as He weeps with me. 

I have blessed peace 

With my Lord so near

Leaning on the everlasting arms. 

Leaning on Jesus

Leaning on Jesus

Safe and secure from all alarm

Leaning on Jesus

Leaning on Jesus

Leaning on the everlasting arms.